I’ve learned to photograph wildlife by using monkey techniques like whipping crap against a wall.

My work started out like this:

When I started out taking pictures of wildlife I was just happy to get an image of the animal. As you can see, I accomplished that with this poor pumba. However, it is a shitty photograph. The pumba isn’t properly framed, the pic is a little blurry, and I did not process the photo at all. It’s just a shitty and I’m sorry, pumba.

However, if you whip enough crap at a wall you start to get better at poo flinging.

In the 1.5 years since I have been trying to be some form of wildlife photographer I’ve been able to cobble together a few images that don’t make me want to vomit up the tater tots I just ate.

This is the only photo that I have taken were someone has ever asked for a printed copy. That made me really proud.

Still, one decent photo here and there is something a photography monkey can improve upon. Thus, I have signed up for photography course through Missy Timko’s Powder Blue Photography.

I’m looking forward to getting a real technical photography education. I mean, how does exposure impact pics? What are all the buttons and do-dadds on my camera? And what the flying 4-prong f*** is aperture????

Yup, I’m still a monkey trying to take wildlife pics, but I hope that after this course I’ll at least be an ape trying to take wildlife pics.

Here I am trying to take some pics. What are all of these buttons on this camera?